I have a little bit of leadership experience in my life. Not much, but some.
And I wrestle with it. I wrestle with what my role should look like, how I should speak, act, behave, and think.
I write about it quite a bit too. This post may sound similar to previous posts on my blog.
I think our churches need weak leaders.
I think our families need weak leaders.
I think our communities need weak leaders.
Let me clarify what I mean when I say that.
I think that right now in our present day and age, leaders are supposed to be strong, stoic, emotionless men and women who are put on pedestals.
I experienced that big time in college. I had the opportunity to lead ministries on and off campus, speak in chapels, lead mission teams, etc. And there was almost always a weight (often self-imposed) to be strong, to be perfect, to uphold the image of whatever ministry I found myself leading.
As a matter of fact, what drew me to my now wife Jamie was that she never accepted that version of me. From the beginning of our relationship she would tell me that she knew there was more to me than my public image. She gave me the freedom to step down off the pedestal I had been put on.
I still feel that weight at times. I still have felt the expectation to not crack under the pressure of leadership.
Yet, when I look at Scripture, I see only one strong Man. His Name is Jesus. Every other character was broken. Every other person in the story had flaws and failures. Every other person was weak.
I just recently started looking closely at the book of Genesis. It’s a beautiful book. It’s not its own set apart story. It is the beginning of a much larger story that spans all of Scripture: the story of God’s redemptive work on behalf of and through His chosen, covenant people.
We quickly see just how insignificant we are. How weak we are. It’s counter-cultural. It’s certainly not going to be featured in any self-image, self-help blogs. But it’s the reality of our lives.
then the Lord God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living creature. – Genesis 2:7
I am of dust.
Meaning, I am insignificant.
It also means that I am reliant upon God in everything.
Acts 17 echoes this.
The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in temples made by man, nor is he served by human hands, as though he needed anything, since he himself gives to all mankind life and breath and everything. – Acts 17:24-25
One of my favorite prayers is “Thank You Lord for this day, thank You for giving me life and breath and everything else.”
It keeps going in Scripture though.
Look at 1 Corinthians 15.
For this perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality. – 1 Corinthians 15:53
One day our dusty, broken bodies will be replaced with spiritual, heavenly bodies that will not fade.
Until then, I believe that we need weak leaders. Not in the terms of timidity, cowardice, and the like, but rather in terms of confession, emotion, prayer, and admitting weakness.
1. Confess Sin
One of the worst misunderstandings in Christian culture is that pastors are supposed to be perfect. Yes, they are clearly held to a higher standard in the Scriptures, but there is only one holy man, and again, His Name is Jesus.
In my pedestal days at OBU, there was so much sin in my heart that I felt like I couldn’t take to anyone about (again, until Jamie). Which was again likely self-imposed. I bought the press of being different and unique in regards to sin.
I look around and literally bi-weekly, some famous pastor in our country falls into moral failure of some degree.
I combat that path by consistently and constantly bringing my sin into the light. I meet with a counselor/mentor a couple times a month, and I do my best to drag sin into the light.
When wise and applicable, I speak about sin struggles from the pulpit.
When wise and applicable, I speak about sin struggles to my students as well.
My hope and prayer is that no one in the church I attend ever sees me as perfect.
2. Admit Weakness
Until pretty recently, I thought I had to have all the answers and had to excel at every area of my job. Thankfully God has taught me that a true leader admits weakness. And honestly, it’s freeing. It’s freeing to acknowledge that I have a great team of volunteers around me that are way better at certain things than I am.
But think about how counter-cultural that is.
Our culture flocks to leaders that exude confidence and bravado, who act the part.
Saying “I’m weak in this area” is one way for me to acknowledge my dustiness.
3. Pray. Pray. Pray.
Lord help me for all the times I’ve acted like I don’t need You.
Prayer is the clearest proof of acknowledging weakness. It’s the clearest way to say “God, I need you for life, breath, and everything else.” This season of my life without a pastor has given me a new appreciation for how much I need Jesus. Every hour I need Him.
If you aren’t prayerful, you likely have bought the lie that you’re strong.
4. Don’t Be Afraid To Share Your Emotions
One part of American leadership that I’ve always wrestled with is the idea of stoicism. This is even more imposed on masculine leadership.
I acknowledge fully that I’m wired differently. I am an emotive person. But when I look at Scripture, I see more than enough room for emotions being displayed, even by those in positions of leadership.
Yes, wisdom and maturity are important. But acknowledging sadness, discouragement, fear, and the like is a practice that I have started to do with the team around me (I literally talked last night at youth about how I wrestle sometimes with my identity in Christ, how I get discouraged). And so far, none of them have told me that they no longer want to follow me. Maybe, just maybe, it’s refreshing to people.
I am imperfect at being weak.
But I do think that our churches, homes, and communities need more weak leaders.
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In His Name,